Coping

Back in the saddle of the asthma flare. Travis so wisely pointed out yesterday that I spend a lot of time hating this . . . so I'm trying to work on that. It's a common theme through trials that we focus on "coping." There are so many ways to "cope" - so many not healthy or helpful. But yet, we trudge along "coping." What if, instead of coping, we embrace. That is not a novel idea to some but to me, it seems unnatural. It seems ridiculous. It seems like being happy about what's happening. But I'll freely admit I think I'm missing the point of the definition. I don't think embracing always means happy - that would be faking. I think, perhaps, embracing means to stop fighting so hard against what is happening. To stop wasting so much energy on hating it and instead be in the moment. Listen to the girls laughing at some ridiculous silly thing they found to do in their rooms and instead of pout about how I'm not in the middle of every great situation with them but instead smile and appreciate that they are able to entertain themselves and are bonding as sisters. I can open the blinds in my room and instead of frowning over the fact that I can't go sit on my deck as everyone is mowing their grass and enjoy the view of our lovely backyard saying a quick pray of thanks for our beautiful home. Instead of looking ahead on the calendar and wistfully mourning all the event's I'm going to miss over the coming days and weeks, stop in the moment and be thankful for this moment and this breath and this family and this life. Easy to change these thoughts and stop hating this #@%* asthma, NOPE. Easy to refocus on all the little things that are good instead of the big things that are bad, NOPE. Completely necessary for my sanity, YUP. So, my dear astute husband, I will make a concerted effort not to spend so much time hating and instead embrace. Wish me luck.

(Ironically, I just checked my inbox and found an article from one of my favorite authors - Jill Savage - titled LOVE YOUR NOW) 

She says, " What kind of statement is that? How does one love their "now?" And if we can wrap our brain around the concept, sometimes it doesn't seem like there's a lot to love about our "now." 

God's been teaching me, however, that when I don't love my now, I miss so much.  In fact, in mourning "what isn't" I miss "what is." Our days are filled with interruptions. Our dreams are dashed by reality. Our expectations are burst like a balloon that comes in contact with a sharp pin.  But what if we could embrace "what is" instead of ruminating on "what could have been?" If you and I can learn to do that more often, we'll learn to love our now and we'll help our family love their now, too.  The Bible says, "A God-like life gives us much, when we are happy for what we have." (I Timothy 6:6 NLV) When we love our now, contentment increases, joy expands, and peace prevails.  This is what we gain! I know I want that kind of "gain" in my life more than anything else!"

Ok - not at all ironic. There is not a lot of irony in God's plan. It's incredible and sometimes down right ridiculous how a reoccurring theme crops up in your life that you need to work on. So there it is. Loving my now (or starting to try).

Growing

Hannah will turn eleven in June. Eleven. This is her last year in elementary school. She is definitely growing up. I am so grateful, however, that she is not growing up to fast. She's currently up in her room with a good friend giggling her head off while singing Mandisa in a hairbrush microphone.

We've started listening to Mandisa's song Good Morning in the car on our way to school. Love when great positive things get stuck in my head. And love watching my growing up girl still act like a silly little girl!

Now, go grab a cup of coffee and have a good morning!!

Glimpse into the Past

I found an old journal this morning and was scanning the pages. Within it are tons of stories of "a day in the life" back in the day. It was the blog before there was such a thing as a blog. This made me crack up and I had to share . . .

Tuesday November 6, 2006

        I feel myself changing for the better lately as a woman and a mother. Two recent things happened that would have sent the old me off the deep end. My new reaction pleasantly surprised me. One day while Travis was gone to Minnesota for a leadership convention, Buddy (our old dog who we had for a very short time due to his insanity) pooped on the floor. Not nice . . . but not new. I quickly scooped the girls up to the table (Haley in high chair and Hannah in big girl chair) and gave them a snack. Then, using my patent pending baggie technique, I cleaned up the poo and took Buddy outside. I waited about 1 minute for him to sniff around then tried to get back inside. Hannah had locked the door. I started talking through the motions of unlocking but instead, she locked the dead bolt. She really started to panic saying, "Mommy . . . come help me - I can't!" To which I calmly explained was impossible given the current situation. Finally, grace be to God, she got the door open. At which point I hear Haley screaming and Hannah says sheepishly, "Mommy, come look what happened!!" My mind instantly imagined Haley's high chair flipped over trapping her tiny body. I bolted into the dining room to discover (Haley's fine) Hannah had opened the whole container of snack puffs and EXPLODED them everywhere like a 4th of July fire cracker. It took me a split second to snap out of my stunned stupor to realize Buddy is chowing down. I quickly locked him in his kennel, told Hannah to stay at the table, scooped up a crying baby, pulled out the vacuum, cleaned up the puffs, put away the vacuum, bounced the baby, entertained the toddler, and took a sigh . . . who said this job was easy?! But, I didn't panic, I didn't cry, I didn't get overwhelmed, I just took each little task one by one as it came and I think I succeeded!
        Last night, we invited the Marsh family over to watch the Seahawks game and eat pizza. At half time, the power went out which woke up the baby. She was entertained for a while until the novelty of no power wore off. I opened the fridge to get out a bottle and heard a crash. In a split second the door shelf broke hurtling the ketchup bottle to it's demise - it shattered on the kitchen floor causing a volcanic eruption of sweet tomato sauce to spew forth on my recently cleaned floor. That same instance, an uncontrollable laughter grew inside me that I could not hide. I laughed and laughed and laughed. I have no idea what the rest of our family though of my reaction by I felt so free and full of joy. Who cares that the power went off in the middle of the football game and we had a house full of family eating pizza in the dark, a baby up way past her bed time and a kitchen full of ketchup - life is full of moments of hilarity and what a blessing to experience them free from anxiety and stress!!
      

Go Jump in a Lake

Or sit beside it with a cup of coffee and a great girlfriend. Bliss.

MUST read

I love keeping track of all the books I've read each year. My type-A list maker self enjoys seeing the growing list looking back fondly (and sometimes not so fondly) at what I've completed. I guess being a mom doesn't have a lot of opportunities to "finish" anything. You do the sink full of dishes, cook one meal, turn around and the sink is full. You do copious amounts of laundry, fold, put away, turn around and the laundry baskets are overfilling. The point is, to actually finish something feels good.

I love recommending good books to friends and have a few great book buddies who do the same for me. So let me be your book buddy and recommend the best book I've read so far this year.

They say you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover but the second I laid eyes on this beautiful book, I was captivated. Let me back up and tell you how I got this book. It was recommended by one of my book buddies who said, "This book truly changed my life!" Then the next morning, when I came downstairs to make a cup of coffee, I found this book laid on top of this beautiful journal right next to my coffee maker.

 



 

After she reassured me she wasn't a stalker and had given it all to Hannah who placed it there on her way out the door, I couldn't wait to dig in. I am always hesitant when someone says it changed their life because I don't want to be disappointed plus I know from experience that sometimes you have to be in a certain place or a certain mood for something to "change your life."

One chapter in, it was already changing my life. That sounds so hokey and cheesy as I type that but I'm not kidding. And part of it was because I was in one of those places in which I needed an attitude adjustment and a shake up. But part of it was because it's a beautifully written, honest, inspiring, incredible book. I don't want to give it all away because you must must must read it . . . but the premise is that the author gets challenged by a friend to write 1000 gifts in a thankful journal/notebook. She starts on day one hesitating to even come up with two or three. As the days progress though, she starts to see the little things all around her that are actually gifts and soon her pen is flying with.

I started writing the first day taking the challenge on myself. I also found great hesitation in coming up with something to say. As I continued to read about Ann's journey however, I was able to recognize all the amazing "little" things around me. I only allowed myself to read one chapter a night as there were sooo much insightful things I didn't want to rush past anything. And I marked a million passages with one of my favorite things; post-it sticky tabs. I wrote down the passages in a little notebook I keep by my bed to record things from books that inspire me, encourage me, challenge me or make me laugh so I can go back later and read the highlights. That little notebook is now quite filled with great bits from this book.

You MUST read this book. It may not "change your life" but it is sure to make you think about the way to look at life - and don't we all need that reminder sometimes?

Quite a catch up . . .

Because I haven't blogged in so long, there are many milestones I haven't included in this family "diary." Let the review begin . . .

Over the summer, Haley and I canned pickles. It was so much fun to work on a project together and it's oh so rewarding to watch the counter fill with fruit (or veggies) from our labor.

After they sat in our pantry for a while it was finally time to pull them out and sample our wares. I'd love to lie and say they were the best pickles ever . . . but I have to be honest and say, they were so salty it wasn't even funny. I have no idea what went wrong as we followed a recipe to a "t" but we'll try again next year.

Skipping ahead a few months  . . . Halloween brought along some fun costumes for the whole family. We went to "The Farm" in Snohomish which has to be one of the coolest places in our area for the fall. They have animals, hay rides, trackers to play on, corn kernels to jump in, yummy foods (corn on the cob, hot apple cider etc.) and of course, great pumpkins. This year, we took Mandy, one our most favoritest cousins with us which only added to the fun!!

And we all jumped on the dress up wagon . . . cause it's fun!!

We had a blast walking around our neighborhood!

November brought a long anticipated and saved for vacation to DISNEYLAND!!!!!

The last time we had flown on a plane, both girls were pretty little so even the plane ride was fantastic. The night before we actually entered the park was sooooo hard to sleep as we knew bright and early the next day, we'd be in Disneyland for real!!! All the saving and planning and dreaming came to fruition . . .

After a true welcome from some well loved characters, we were off to explore the park, ride some rides and experience one of the best weeks our family has ever had.

We split our time equally between Disneyland and California Adventure and got favorites in each park. Because it was the first weekend of November, the crowds were unbelievably small. We hardly waited in a single line and were able to ride tons and tons and tons of rides.

In Disneyland, we found the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique in which the girls were transformed into beautiful princesses.

In seven days, we saw everything possible to see, rode everything possible to ride, ate every Mickey thing possible to eat, watched every possible show and parade, met every character possible to meet, and made more memories that I'd ever thought possible. We will NEVER forget this vacation!

I've been to Disneyland many times as a kid and even a few times as an adult but this was my most favorite trip in the whole world. Watching the trip through their eyes was amazing!!

Haley lost her first tooth. No - it was not the first tooth to come out but the others have had to be pulled out by the dentist. She's like a shark and keeps getting a second row of teeth behind the baby teeth. It was a big event to actually be able to pull one out herself!!

January brought another asthma flare - the first on in two years. It was so frusting . Logically I know it's a cronic illness but knowing it and then living it are two seperate things. It was so nice to pretend it didn't exist. There had to be much adjustment to family life around the house as mom was out of commission for a month and a half. Through the support of some amazing family members and great friends as well as a very understanding staff, we made it out the other side and have entered the "recovery zone" in which we baby step off some nasty but life saving drugs and wait out the side effects hoping to once again returning to "normal" whatever that means!!

On March 7th, my dad turned 60. The man who taught me how to work hard, take care of those around you and laugh through life, entered the next decade in his journey. We celebrated with a family dinner and enjoyed telling and hearing fun stories of the last  60 years. I can't describe how much I love my Dad. He is like no other and I wouldn't trade him for the world.

Hannah participated in her first ever track meet. She is one well rounded kiddo and is involved in so many great activities. This year she decided to give Runner's Club a try. After weeks of practice and a day of running in the halls, the grand finale was a track meet at the high school including all four elementary schools in our district. All we ever ask of our kids is that they try their best. If they come in last but they tried their best, then we're thrilled. It was Hannah's idea to put in some evenings of practice with her track coach daddy. My favorite part of the whole thing was that it was all her own ideas. We didn't ask her to join. We didn't tell her she needed to practice. It was all her. The big day came and we had a blast watching her run the 400. She came in 8th out of 30. Great! Then came the 4x400 relay. The first girl took off like a shot and quickly ran to the head of the pack with lots of room to spare. Then came Hannah's turn and after a successful handoff, she took off at an even greater speed and widened the gap!! At this point I am screaming like a crazy woman. I was so excited for her! I was amazed at the fact that even when the girl behind her began to close the gap, Hannah stayed her steady pace and focused on her race allowing her to give girl number three a nice leg up. Girl numbered three ran a good race and a few of the other teams caught up with us. And then came the grand finale hand off. I would have been thrilled for Hannah to have felt so proud of her winning lap but I could see the possibility of a group victory and I was off my seat!! Girl number four got the baton and ran like the wind!! Half way around the track, Hannah and the rest of her teammates started jogging along the last little stretch cheering and screaming for their teammate. As she crossed the finish line in first place, the feeling of pride as her momma swelled inside of me and as I saw the sweet Grandma Merry tears, you would have thought Hannah had just won the Olympics!! I would have been just as excited for her to have come in last. It was so cool that she chose an activity that was new to her, stuck it out and tried her best. But man was it fun to see a victory!!!

And last, but certainly not least, my sweet little sister is going to have a baby!! We couldn't be more excited around here to welcome a new nephew/cousin very soon!! I may be bias but I think she's the cutest pregnant lady around!! I went up north on Monday as I had the honor of being at an ultrasound and we added a surprise visit to our grandma. I can't tell you how special it was to see her love on that sweet belly that held her first ever great grandson!!

There it is. The long awaited and much needed catch up of the Marsh family. I am grateful to Hannah and her inspiration to re-start something we love so much. And I am grateful to all those around us who make this life worth blogging about!

We titled this blog "The Years are Short" . . . one of my favorite speakers said, "In life the days seem long but looking back the years are so short." May we take advantage of each day - to capture the good and the bad and the in between in this crazy journey because in spite of the never ending loads of laundry and ever piling sink of dishes and repetitive chores and events and highs and lows and expected and surprising, the years are short and so worth every moment.



Ready or Not . . .

A few years ago I found a company that turned your blog into a book that you could order and have a copy for your home. I excitedly ordered it for the first year of my blog. Then ordered it after the second year of my blog. Then life happened, blogging got spotty, and I haven't even written enough to fill a new book.

Fast forward to this week. Hannah found the blog books in the book shelf and started to read. She loved every minute. It was a snapshot of our family's life over the years and reminded her of all kinds of things we did. She even said, "Mom, you're really funny!" Which I am writing her for posterity here so when she is 16 and doesn't think her mom is that cool, she can read this blog post and remember?! (Remember 16 year old Hannah? You used to think your mom was funny?)

Anyhoo . . . when she finished devouring both books, she asked me if I would start blogging again so that she can read the next book when it is published. Published? What a doll.

Ready or not . . . here I blog.